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There are two kinds of people in the world, those who believe there are two kinds of people in the world and those who don't.
—  Robert Charles Benchley
Drinking makes such fools of people, and people are such fools to begin with, that it's compounding a felony.
—  Robert Charles Benchley
The most common of all antagonisms arises from a man's taking a seat beside you on the train, a seat to which he is completely entitled.
—  Robert Charles Benchley
It took me fifteen years to discover that I had no talent for writing, but I couldn't give it up because by then I was too famous.
—  Robert Charles Benchley
I must get out of these wet clothes and into a dry Martini.
—  Robert Charles Benchley
The surest way to make a monkey of a man is to quote him.
—  Robert Charles Benchley
Most of the arguments to which I am a party fall somewhat short of being impressive, owing to the fact that neither I nor my opponent knows what we are talking about.
—  Robert Charles Benchley
For a nation which has an almost evil reputation for bustle, bustle, bustle, and rush, rush, rush, we spend an enormous amount of time standing around in line in front of windows, just waiting.
—  Robert Charles Benchley
Anyone can do any amount of work, provided it isn't the work he is supposed to be doing.
—  Robert Charles Benchley
A boy can learn a lot from a dog: obedence, loyalty, and the importance of turning around three times before lying down.
—  Robert Charles Benchley
An ardent supporter of the hometown team should go to a game prepared to take offense, no matter what happens.
—  Robert Charles Benchley
As for me, except for an occasional heart attack, I feel as young as I ever did.
—  Robert Charles Benchley
I can't bring myself to say, 'Well, I guess I'll be toddling along.' It isn't that I can't toddle. It's just that I can't guess I'll toddle.
—  Robert Charles Benchley
It has always seemed to me that the most difficult part of building a bridge would be the start.
—  Robert Charles Benchley
Tell us your phobias and we will tell you what you are afraid of.
—  Robert Charles Benchley

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This online quotation search tool is used to search thousands of quotes by author, word or phrase.

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